Am I too desperate?

Question

I'm going on 22 in college and have never been out on a date, had a kiss or really even had a guy approach me if it wast for school. I see all my friends getting into relationships and getting engaged and I can't help but feel sad because I want what they have. I just find myself longing for my first kiss as cliche as it sounds. I just wanna know what it's like you know.

Answer 1

smile n style is key to success.

Answer 2

How do you view the boys you know? Or, to put it another way, what is the chance that you would have a relationship with any of them? Have you ever given yourself an opportunity to fall in love. Quite often things happen on first encounters because there is no prejudgement of that person.



You can if you choose get on the cattle market. It seems to be big business these days. You have a choice from clubbing to online dating sites.



When was the last time you were invited to a party and turned up bottle in hand? Ever thought about arranging your own? Think of a theme, a location, a time, a reason and get a socialite or two to give you a hand.



Then there is targetting. That is homing in on some hapless guy. You first task is to get him to talk to you. He's flattered because you are paying an interest in him. If you find he is a complete bore you make your excuses and leave. If you are comfortable with him the next stage is to get him to listen to you. A little more difficult because we men tend to be full of ourselves. But certainly you can develop a relationship with someone who can shut up, listen and respond intelligently. Of course there are those men who will open their ears in the hope that you will open your legs



That reminds me - talk to female friends. You will probably find that they know all about men, and all the tricks to trapping, seducing and ditching. It is likely to be a mixture of lies and half truths. If you accept an offer to get hooked up, then you are desperate.



If things are not working out as you may hope, unless you make some changes things will remain much as they have been. I would reckon that most of your friends who are now developing their relationships met when they were teenagers, and it seems that the older one gets there are fewer opportunities for chance encounters, particularly if all the eligible bachelors are spoken for.



To be the lady of a man's dreams you have to put yourself in a new situation, this might mean a change of accommodation, of work place, or where you worship, or socialise.



The final warning is be careful what you wish for. We men tend to have an over rated opinion of ourselves, and most men who get married are oft reminded they were not the answer to the maiden's prayer.

Answer 3

That’s perfectly normal. Not desperate at all. You’re a woman. You’re supposed to feel these things. I’m sure you’re looking for a guy who is going to treat you with respect.

Answer 4

Wait for your Mr. Right

Answer 5

Just wait until you meet the right guy. Don't rush into anything, you are not desperate you are patient i would say. It is a good thing just wait until u are comfortable with someone and know when its the right moment to kiss them.

Answer 6

Yes and too obsessed with the whole dating thing too. Why don't you just enjoy your life and stop being so silly.

Answer 7

as long as your not throwing yourself at any boy .. no

Answer 8

Start learning all about dating.There are plenty of books out there for women.Try these:



1)"Date Or Soul Mate?" By Neil Clark Warren.



2)"Falling in love for all the right reasons".

By Neil Clark Warren.



3)"Are You The One For Me?"

By Barbara De Angelis.



4)"Its not him,its you". By Christie Hartman.



5)"Hollywood Dating Blunders:rules,questions and warning signs to avoid the bloopers". By Jim Carroll & Dennis Foose.



6)"The Little Book Of Red Flags".

By Natasha Burton.



7)"Deal Breakers". By Dr.Bethany Marshall.



8):The Dirty Seven:Ladies Beware."

By June Marshall.



9)"The Complete Idiots Guide To Handling A Break Up". By Rosanne Rosen.



Those books are still available new and second hand.

Answer 9

No one day you’ll meet the one

Answer 10

Meeting some new people is a great place to start, especially being in college. While I was ultimately unsuccessful in getting a girlfriend, I did come very close three times. In each of those cases what had happened with those potential girlfriends is that they had to move away for one reason or another which brings me to my point. Proximity to guys is key, so the more you can get the better. Meanwhile just be yourself and be friendly and the rest of the required elements for a relationship will have a chance to follow.

Answer 11

I am same as you, but i am 18 and i am pretty sure i will be the same as now when i will be 22 😂😂

Answer 12

No, you're not to desperate. It's normal to want a relationship at your age especially if you've never experienced one before, but just don't let that want consume you and be all that you think about. If you don't mind please answer my question https://answersrip.com/question/index?qid=20180116003105AAP4B5w

Answer 13

You're not desperate. Go and approach guys, I'm sure many guys want to kiss you.

Answer 14

I'm really proud of you

Answer 15

I would love to date you just for a kiss and a hug, if I went to school with you, I would soooo ask you out

Answer 16

You're the opposite of desperate. If you were desperate, you would screw the first guy on the street that you saw.

Answer 17

There's a lid for every pot;))!

Answer 18

You are not desperate! The best way to find someone is actually not to look for love but let it come to you! The right guy will come around when you least expect it!

Answer 19

yes

Answer 20

You can't hurry love.

Answer 21

Don’t be sad

Answer 22

You’re not desperate for wanting to experience something you never have before. It’s completely normal. Get out more and meet new people, but don’t force anything. The right person will come to you at the right time, timing is everything. Besides, relationships are over rated sometimes. Focus on yourself & your goals and the perfect person will fall into your life.

Answer 23

what is the problem?some of your girlfriends who have "boyfriend"..their boyfriends just used them for sex..😂😂

Answer 24

Don't worry. I'm 38 and I have yet to kiss a girl.



It will happen, someday. I have faith

Answer 25

No, its not desperate, you just long to experience something you've never had. Like you've been playing a game for a whole day but you havent been able to level up.

Answer 26

No not at all. I used to be in the same position as all my friends had relationships and their first kiss before me. There's nothing wrong with wanting that but unfortunately it just happens when you don't expect it. I promise when it does happen you will realise it's not a big deal

Answer 27

It will happen

Answer 28

You have years ahead of you. Why not join one of the college societies?

Widen your circle of friends. Now is not always.

Answer 29

Not really. You're in luck, young enough to change your life & remember... you don't have to sit there waiting for someone to pick you up & make you go out with them.

Don't stare at your phone like all other woman do.

Don't avoid eye contact.

Do look at people & smile to get their attention.

Do say hi and tell someone if you think they look good, compliment them. They might not understand your intentions at first (because people people are waiting for their phone to tell them what to do) but persistence pays off.

Yup, i'm that guy that lectures people on the internet & tries to help them improve themselves.

Good luck!

Answer 30

Yes

Answer 31

why do you want to go on a date,you are still young and you should focus more on your study,at 21,many people have never been in a relationship ,

Answer 32

You sound desperate af just don't even try.

Answer 33

I feel the same way as you '-'

Answer 34

Desperate? Not at all to be honest but you sound lonely. Which is normal everyone gets lonely sometimes. It will happen though you will meet a great guy try putting yourself out there a little more but in a good way.

Answer 35

If you need to ask a bunch of total online strangers if you're too desperate, it means only one thing. You really are too desperate.

Answer 36

Hahahahaha. Same.

Answer 37

Hi Justine, stupid name by the way, you need to start talking to the same guys your girlfriends are talking to. Convince them you are the better woman, you might need to change your name first, and start from there.

Answer 38

the time will come when it’s meant to be

Answer 39

It's actually a good thing that you haven't been in a relationship yet - it means that you've avoided a broken heart.



May I suggest that the first question to ask yourself when considering whether or not to date someone is, “Is this person a strong person?” If they’re not, no matter how much you like them, how much they like you, or how “cute” or “hot” they are, - please don’t date them. A strong person has good character (honesty, integrity, trustworthiness), displays a positive attitude (cheerful, caring, friendly, forgiving, helpful, and respectful), fulfills their responsibilities (for handling pains in a positive way, for always trying to make a good choice, for taking care of themselves, for serving others), gives their best effort, and demonstrates self-control (of their body, anger, mouth and money). A strong person isn't overly concerned with what weak mean people say, do, or think.



My suggestion is that you put in the effort necessary to become a strong person (if you’re not already) and eventually look for this type of guy (otherwise you are setting yourself up for a broken heart). Unfortunately this type of man is difficult to find – but save yourself the heartache and don’t settle for less.



(Please remember that you eventually want a 50 or 60 year marriage - not a 5 or 10 year marriage.)



Hope this helps!



Here are "21 tips that could help you to attract a strong person" from the book True Love Lasts and Straight Talk About Dating:

:



1. Take the time and put in the effort to become a strong person yourself (this is the most important tip)



2. Put yourself in as many situations as possible that will allow you to potentially come in contact with other strong people - community service organizations, the library, high school or college clubs, the “Y” or other workout facilities, religious book studies, coffee shops, non-alcoholic parties, bookstores, concerts (wear a good pair of earplugs to protect your ears from permanent hearing loss), co-ed recreational athletic teams, community service projects, mission trips, volunteer service, etc. Try to get to know other people as much as possible without dating



3. Be cheerful, approachable, and friendly - smile regularly to put others at ease (let people see your positive attitude)



4. Take a real interest in getting to know others. Ask people an open-ended question about themselves in order to get them talking. Share things related to what’s been said as needed to keep the conversation going. Then ask them another question



5. Be polite and kind to everyone - even to people who you don’t like or enjoy being around



6. If you decide to not accept a request for a date, do it in a kind way (being rude isn’t a good choice and it doesn’t help you - word about it will get out and you’ll become less approachable)



7. Be confident about yourself - if you’re trying to become a stronger person each day, you already have a lot going for you



8. Be humble - don’t act like you’re Miss Charming or you’re Mr. Wonderful



9. Don’t be concerned about whether or not someone likes you



10. Have the attitude that if someone doesn’t like you - they don’t really know you



11. Take care of yourself by getting enough sleep (at least nine hours for teens, at least seven hours for adults according to the experts), exercising regularly (if approved by your doctor), and eating a healthy diet



12. Develop a good sense of humor - including the ability to laugh at your own mistakes



13. Be known as a hard worker



14. Dress well and dress modestly at the same time (wearing seductive clothing doesn’t attract another strong person)



15. Pay attention to your appearance, but don’t obsess over it (remember that strong people are attracted to other strong people, they’re not too concerned about looks - because they realize that looks fade with age). If you use makeup, make sure it’s not excessive. Use perfumes and colognes sparingly - if at all



16. Truly care about other people



17. Stay in close communication with real friends who can help you through the ups and downs of life and hold you accountable



18. Be patient - real friends can help you with this



19. Persevere - please remember that almost nothing worthwhile is quick and easy. Please don’t settle for dating a weak person



20. Don’t take it personally if someone doesn’t want to date you



21. Don’t act desperate for a date

Answer 40

No , normal woman , women are not genuinely attracted to men and have no sexual desire anyway , at least you are not pretending to be something you are not , like these women that fake desire for a man to use him.

Answer 41

one day you'll meet someone

Answer 42

Buy a sex toy and some weed and in the meantime be patient

Answer 43

Same but I’m 18 and don’t know how to talk to guys

Answer 44

No you’re not desperate. What you feel is natural and legitimate but everyone’s time comes. I know for a fact that there is someone made for everyone. Just stay cool and confident in the mean while. Good things will surely happen.

Answer 45

No you aren't.

Answer 46

I was 18 and had never been kissed. Then I went to a frat party and had my frist kiss and makeout the same night

Answer 47

I was in the same position as you when i was twenty, almost twenty one, and had never had proper bf or kissed or anything I was even thinking of taking up the offer of going out with a thirty year old guy that liked me that I have met at a cafe. Then my best friend introduced me to the love of my life and here i am literally one year later engaged. Your whole life can change so quickly and so unexpectidly, and there will be new challenges. I was always told my guy is out there and blah blah and i didn't buy that bull. But hey it worked out. Wait it out. Wish for it and keep that mentality that you are desireable and have nice qualities. You gotta waltz with confidence.

Answer 48

Are you physically unfit like over weight . its best if you start getting on a diet

Answer 49

Nah, most people are petty, jealous, annoying or fake. Facebook is "reality internet", like reality TV, even if we do not immediately see it. It is a little strange/different you have not kissed someone or had sex. Even if you "long" for it, you see the drama/dumb out there. Not all people are bad.... But wow "throwing yourself out there" because of dumb things you see on facebook, TV or some other place - dah. Don't do that. "UBU" u-b-u...... Talk to people online about things you like. On occasion talk to people at school. Find a game online you can play with a few hundred or thousand other people. Don't cry to us on Yahoo Answers. I'd walk to a local non-college bar and drink a few shots of tequila until I got laid, if I were you. Other than that you are fine. A yahoo troll or a bit of a drama queen. No one will be this honest (you watch)

Answer 50

Probably desperate and inexperienced.

Answer 51

Nah

Answer 52

You are ugly sorry to say

Answer 53

Nah

Answer 54

Those desires don't make you desperate. It's how you act on those desires that determine whether or not you're desperate.



If you go about getting a boyfriend in a patient, detatched and methodical way, then you won't be desperate.



If you rush into things too quickly and on impulse, then you'll be too desperate.

Answer 55

Maybe you’re too naive or not good with social interactions. It’ll happen eventually, hopefully but I don’t know maybe ask some people who know you personally. Maybe they can offer some solid advice.

Answer 56

No it’s okay to feel that way

Answer 57

guys will act like they're too cool for you but aren't. Just don't be obese and you're set. also be cute and shy because guys like it.

Answer 58

no need to rush anything, you just are not ready or haven't found the right person yet. Just don't rush the small things , just breathe and relax, don't grow up too fast, just enjoy the moments

Answer 59

Dont worry. You will find the perfect guy someday. Just dont give up

Answer 60

The important thing in college is to do well in your studies. Social life should take a minor role because it your social life infringes upon your studies and you do not achieve your academic goals you might not have the social life you want for the greater part of your life after you graduate. If you do not get into the field and society you want you may end up in a place where your social choices are much more limited because the job you get if you do not do well will not put you near people with the same interests that you have. You stand a better chance of meeting people of like interests which will lead to a better social life and better chance to find a life partner who will be compatible. I you sacrifice your school work to try for dates you can end up losing your one big chance for happiness and success in life both in what ever career you choose and in you social life too. Some people who party through college live to regret it.

Answer 61

Desperate? No. You just haven't met the right person yet. Just be more confident and open your heart. You'll find many people that will interest you.

Answer 62

I don't feel you are, no, however, that being said... I recommend psychotherapy for you because it can be of great help in situations like this. If you can find a good therapist who you can bond with, he or she can help you see past fears and insecurities in such a way that you can enjoy the world and your life and live in the moment. I'm working on that now too.

Answer 63

NO

Answer 64

You have a right to feel desperate. Keep looking for what you want.

Answer 65

Stay away from men, they are fking douchebags

Answer 66

maybe lower your standards and stop chasing them f-boys

Answer 67

Just wait. You will find someone whether it’s today or in 10 years. Those other people are just craving relationships and will be with an guy that talks to them! Good luck!:)

Answer 68

Don't envy them after kissing and bed room fun comes that big appointment college boy has to book to see the STD specalist or her doctor to find the results of her pregnancy test.

Answer 69

Just get out there and don't give an f what anyone thinks

Answer 70

Your not desperate. It’s natural. List/ Love will come your way.

Make sure you love yourself and take care of you and the rest will fall in place.

Good luck

Answer 71

Duck out of the office today

Answer 72

Be patient it will happen in time!!

Answer 73

Obama was in office in his 50's, Trump started at 70. One person became a CEO at 25 but died at 50, another became a CEO at 50 and lived to 100. China is half a day ahead of the US, but that doesn't mean it is doing better. You have your own timezone, or schedule, to avoid plagiarism, and your pals have theirs. Don't stress over your social status and other's approval too much at your age. You are a fresh young mind at that age, and I rather you focus on building your passion right now, the relationships would come once you have established yourself.

Answer 74

you start dating and your carrier building stops there. So you decide you are desperate for what???

Answer 75

Don't worry. Pray to God.

Answer 76

You are not desperate. No worries, you are feeling as nature intended. Watch under the Tuscan sun for my advice. I have been alone 12 years after marriages and divorce and 4 kids. Never dating just going to college and working on my at home business. I am very happy, but just met, out of the blue, a guy I don't think I can ignore. If you make yourself and your life happy first, I promise he will show up! You can watch the movie "The secret too. Good luck!

Answer 77

you should approach guys then,

Answer 78

I think at 22 you are too young to worry about having idealized romantic experiences that may end up disappointing to you anyway. It's way too early to fret about what you think everyone else is doing. You still need to learn to support yoirself. The right person will come along when you are ready.

Answer 79

Believe in Jesus Christ and you shall have everlasting life! Jesus loves you! Get a king james bible and believe.

Read Matthew.

Read Genesis chapter 2.

Read Ephesians chapter 5.

Pray for help and guidance and understanding.

Read James chapter 1,4.

There are billion men for you so don't give up. Ask nice guy to dinner if you like.

Marry me. Problem solved. [e-mail]

Answer 80

No I’m exactly the same. I’m 23 turning 24 in 3 months and my lucks been bad with girls. I don’t feel sad if someone I know has a girlfriend but I do feel sad for myself because I guess there is a point in life when you do need someone. I guess we just have to wait and see. Unfortunately all we can do is see if someone likes us back. We can never get someone and this is why I think it’s hard getting someone than it is getting a car or something.

Answer 81

You're exactly the type of girl that I'm looking for.

Answer 82

No, you're just a late bloomer. It'll happen, just do your thing and be happy. Be confident and be your own best friend. Lastly, don't settle..just because everyone's doing it, doesn't mean you have to.

Answer 83

I don't think wanting a relationship is desperate in itself. Taking anyone who throws themselves at you, or throwing yourself at random people that might not even be a good match for you just to enter a relationship, though, is.

Answer 84

not at all but be patient. Better to be with the right guy than some flakey one nightish disaster

Answer 85

Not really

Answer 86

That's all normal!

Answer 87

You have time when you rush. You become desperate and accept anything that comes your way.

Answer 88

if your ugly no one want you

Answer 89

Things happen for people at different times. But you have to go out there and get what you want. If you just stay at home alot and dont go out that much you wont find whats out there for you. You are in control of your own life and there is a person out there for everyone. You just have to go out there and find it, life wont just come knocking at your door

Answer 90

1. First if you are not physically attractive by one person standards that means nothing to another persons standard.

2. No you don’t sound desperate. I think you will be fine personally, I have heard of a people at the age of 40 not having done any of that yet. Part of the reason you feel like this is because we’ve been wired by society to think if we don’t have someone to be with by a certain age we must be undesirable and therefore not worth having. That is far from the truth. Don’t feel bad about seeing your friends get engaged. Be happy for them. Assuming you are all around the same age, not to be pessimistic but marriage at that your age does more harm than good, and it they will find it harder to make it last. I’m not saying it won’t last it’s gonna be harder to keep that commitment.

3. Honestly you do have the better shoe. I’m telling you that as a fellow single person. From the outside in sure it looks great but once you get one, you have to worry about staying in one.

Answer 91

Wait until you meet the right guy sweetheart

Answer 92

soudns despaesr

Answer 93

You’re not desperate :) try to dress up nicely, go out with your friends, look around - if a guy makes eye contact with you, smile at him. Show that you’re confident, most people wouldn’t want to approach a shy person

Answer 94

No

Answer 95

No. Your patient & self respecting. Just don’t be living out of fear. Go with your gut.

Answer 96

No I don’t sound deserve

Answer 97

Nuh uh marriage is so overrated girl . Just focus on your education and you can eventually date later . Get your stuff together because you can depend on no man .

Answer 98

You can find someone just be yourself and if no one want to see how much of an amazing person you are well that’s their problem be happy and when the time is right you willfind the one

Answer 99

Not at all! You will find somebody to share you’re first kiss and date one day and it doesn’t matter how long that takes. I know it might be frustrating but it will happen soon and you’re not being desperate.

Answer 100

Not only was I the same until my late twenties, when I did eventually marry I wondered when would our first child ever arrive. But the doctor told us my sperm count was too low. So I resigned myself to being childless, and lo, when I stopped worrying, my wife got pregnamt immediately. Then my children were in their forties and I was similarly convinced I would never be a grandfather. Now, at 88 I have 6 grandchildren from 2 of my 3 children. Stop worrying, and enjoy life. Nothing will put a man off more than your revealing your desperation!

Answer 101

I’m 20 yo Male never even held hands with a girl so I know how you feel most of my friends have been in relationships and I haven’t so yeah but just know you’re not alone both guys and girls

Answer 102

Maybe