Should i go to ex bf funeral?

Question

My ex bfand I broke up 5 yrs ago. we dated for 3 yrs.We ended our relationship on bad terms, He cheated on me numerous times A few months ago I found out he had cancer and went to visit him. A couples days ago I fouind out that he past away. I'm glad that I went to visit him. His family is having the funeral services this weekend and i dont want to go. My friends all say I should. I don't see why I should go when I dont like his family and have pretty much ended everything 5 years ago.. Please give me some advice on what I should do.

Answer 1

Don't go. Especially if you ended things on bad terms, I'm sure his family has some negative feelings towards you, and they don't need any 'extra' bad feelings on the day of his funeral.



And as for you, I'm glad you got to see him before he died. But you should never go to a funeral that you don't want to go to. What would be the point? To honor someone and pay them your respects doesn't have to be done with a crowd of people who may not like you.



If you were so inclined, you could always visit his gravesite, but it sounds to me like it's a done deal. Over with. And you shouldn't feel bad about not going.

Answer 2

1

Answer 3

I would only do what I feel comfortable with. This is a time of mourning and if you think your presence would bring any tension since you said you don't care for his family then I would most definitely not go out of respect. You visited him before he passed, so if you feel that's enough closure for you than so be it. People kill me trying to force someone to do something they probably wouldn't do themselves. He is your past and there is nothing in the rule book saying when your ex die you have to attend the funeral. If that's what you want to do than do it. Let it be your decision only.

Until next time keep it in the road.

Answer 4

My best friend died 1yr after we stopped talking. I was so confused around the time but I went to the funeral. And I'll tell you this much...if I didn't, i would have regretted it for the rest of my days! I still have difficulty dealing with our fall out. But I did everything I could to lay my demons to rest and with that in mind, I can move on.

Go to the funeral because I really think you'll regret it otherwise, that's just speaking from experience.

Answer 5

You shouldn't go to the funeral. If the parents don't even like you and the relationship ended five years ago, you will only be hurting yourself. Old memories and emotions will be running through your head and that will just make you feel even more bad than it already is. It's been five whole years, it's time to say goodbye and move on.

Answer 6

First of all, how did you feel about his passing?



When you are with someone for 3 years, you must've been in love with him, right? I mean, at least at the moment. Thats what I'll assume.



Being with someone for 3 years means that at some point he was a major part of your life.



He may have hurt you, and things didn't go in the path that you had hoped, but I would suggest you do attend his funeral, at least in honor of whatever good came from your relationship.

Answer 7

He wasn't good to you, he hurt you, his family has no respect for you... There is no reason for you to be at his funeral. I could understand if things were the complete opposite of what they are, but not in this case.

Don't go and there's nothing wrong with your decision. Now tell everyone to stop pushing you and don't feel bad about this. It's COMPLETELY understandable why you wouldn't want to be there - why put yourself through that? Your "friends" need to be more understanding about how you feel.*

Answer 8

You should go! Without a doubt. You guys spend 3 years together. If you think about it you probably know him better than anyone. Yeah he did a bad thing by cheating on you but i think you still should go. His family is probably very upset and they won't even think about what happened in the past between you and him.

Answer 9

Go and say goodbye. That's what funerals are for, not to see If you are accepted, liked or not. It is to say goodbye to the life that was lost. It's also to show support to his family. If you don't go, his family will think you did not care or ever did.

It's only a few hours of your life, you will never see the guy again. Go, you will regeret it If you don't.

Answer 10

If you don't want to go then don't go. And don't let anyone make you go. There are alot of people who don't even go to their relatives or immediate families funerals. I don't like funerals and do not believe it is a way to remember the person. You got to see him before he passed. So I think that is great and good enough. Especially if you feel that way. I wouldn't want to remember anyone the way I do. I went to may grandmothers funeral and was ok with it because my grandpa had a closed casket. I don't even like remembering her sick. So no you are ok and just fine to not want to go. Like I said it is no way to remember someone. If it makes you feel guilty then send a card to his family with your condolences. Good Luck.

Answer 11

Don't go to the funeral!

You'll only upset his family since you said they don't like you.

Sounds like you're at peace with yourself and him so just quietly say a prayer for him that he rest in peace but stay away from the funeral.

Answer 12

Yes, because it's the nice thing to do, but in my opinion i think you should go because later it might be on your mind, and on your shoulder about not going. Good Luck in your decision , hope everything works out !

Answer 13

You won't be going to the funeral for his sake or your own. You will be going to comfort the family.



I think you answered your own question when you state that you don't like his family.

Answer 14

i would say dont go especially if you dont feel comfortable going and being around his family. you went and saw him that was good enough. your relationship ended in bad terms anyway so i would say no

Answer 15

You should go, it is called paying your respects to attend. You went to see him before he passed because a part of you still cared about him . You should go so one day you do not regret that you didn't go.

Answer 16

usually when people go to a funeral it's to help the family with closure but you dont even care about his family or him so why go?

Answer 17

nobody can make you do anything you dont want to do. if you dont want to go, then don't. but since your relationship didnt end on good terms, this might be a good time to make peace with him and say your good-byes.

Answer 18

Definetely go. Even since he cheated on you, you two were still in a relationship and you used to love him. I would go if I were you.

Answer 19

You should go

even though hes done some pretty rough & harsh things to you

you should def go i mean like

you wouldnt like it if you died & cheated on him

and he didnt show up at your Funeral.

so go! be there for him

Answer 20

You don't really have to go. You were not his girlfriend, you still went to see him before it happened, and you don't even like his parents. It is not a must..you don't have to if you don't want to.

Answer 21

i would say go, but since you went to visit and stuff before he passed away it's not completely necessary that you go

Answer 22

Screw him he cheated on you numerous times...sounds like an ***. I wouldn't go, you can always go spit on the grave. Just saying. For real, if it isn't in your heart, then do not go.

Answer 23

i think you should go because you dated for 3 yrs. and it would be the right thing to do.

Answer 24

You should go, to get some closure

and show your support to his family...





I say you go, because you might regret not going.

Answer 25

You've answered you own question. Send a card.

But will this be awkward if you are there and will others resent your presence?

Answer 26

this is a tough one



no1 will blame you if go or not, it's totally up to u. just think if you didnt go, would you have regrets?

Answer 27

yes

Answer 28

Yes. Even if you don't feel you should, you should go.

Answer 29

you seen him that was alot right there dont go

Answer 30

i think you should go. if you dont then you might regret it

Answer 31

no you dont want to bring him back to life woman how stupid can you be

Answer 32

No, you should only do what you feel comfortable doing.

Answer 33

you should go

Answer 34

go with your gut:)