People think I'm gay, but I'm straight!!!!!!!! And now I'm confused!?

Question

Okay so I'd like to start by saying.... I don't have anything against homosexuals, we have family friends who are homosexuals and I respect them.

I'm in year 11, and I am straight! But in year 8 I was friends with a bunch of guys and we were pretty close, but they all started to change ( have food fights in lunch, skateboard [which I'm not into, I'm a swimmer] anyway so I left the group of guys, and because it was my first year of high school I had no other friends so I went to go sit with the only other people I knew, which was with a bunch of girls ( I really really liked this once girl in the group of girls) and then someone from the group of guys made up a rumour that I was gay. But I'm not! And the rumour read all around the school, I even had people in the year above me asking me if I was gay.

It made me seriously question wether I was or wasn't, so much so that I did infant watch homo porn. Except I found it seriously disgusting so I stopped and started to watch straight porn. I don't care about the fact that for about 2 month I watched homo porn because it was just a phase I went through and it means nothing. ( that was in year 9) ever since ,y bunch of friends I have hardly had any friends!

It's year 10 now and the rumour sort of went away except for all the TC's ( too cools) kept it going and it made me seriously angry! I couldn't walk around school without seeing the look on people's faces. The look was as if they wee judging me.

I'm I year 11 now and I have a bunch of friends ( well I really only have about 5-10 close friends) and 99.999999% of them are girls. Ap but during my holidays when I was relaxing I had this thought " why don't I seriously have any friends, especially male friends ?" And the only reason I could think of was because of the rumour, I couldn't get this thought out of my head and at the end of my holidays when I went back to school I couldn't even look at a guy without thinking " careful, you might find him attractive.' ( I DON'T FIND DUDES ATTRACTIVE, when ever I see a dick for what ever reason it makes me want to gag!)

I have this friend, and whenever I do something she doesn't like she would say to me " if you don't do this, I'll tell everyone you really are gay,!" It is really hurtful! Why do people do this? Is it cause I actually care for girls and don't want to see them hurt? I haven't ever had a girlfriend either.

Anyway why do people think I'm gay, when I am straight? And why am I all of a sudden doubting myself?

Answer 1

The same thing happened to me. Everyone called me gay just because I was prettier, more delicate or simply because the girls was around me. I hesitated also wondering if I was gay or not so prepare a brave answer. For example the next time some guy tells you "you're gay" tell him: "Yes, sure. That I said to you last night when we were in bed and was f...cking you"

The secret is to ridicule him in front of his friends. Of course you have to be sure that your friends will be by your side when you face him as well as his friends. Best if you are near a teacher to ensure that the enemy is not going to hurt you. Then make fun of him and disappear. Do the same thing every time he tells you you're gay but NEVER walk alone down the street because the kid will seek revenge if you're alone.

(sorry my bad english, but i think you got it. Right?)

Oh, do not forget to start the same rumor against him asking a close friend to disseminate it among students. Make sure no one suspected that you initiated the rumor and if someone says to you that the guy is gay you say "I don't think so ... People talk without knowing"...

Answer 2

Hey there. Just came across this a bit late. I first off wanna say that I'm sorry for what your going thro. Kids can be crule and there all trying to establish identity and value and by putting others down that's how they think they can do so. Unfortunately it doesn't come that way. I was bullied my whole life from age 7 and even till today (some people don't grow up) about being gay. Unfortunately words do effect you. And I struggle tremendously w homosexuality as a result (plus the absenteeism of a father figure did not help). My advice to you would be first tofind another school where you can meet and bond w other guys otherwise your going to have a hard time in life with making male friends. Begin to reach out. It's not healthy to have women friends only. Second take a risk and ask a girl out you like. Third now that you have experienced bullying have compassion on others who go through the same thing (gay or straight) and be friend, defend etc them. Good luck

Answer 3

Your situation is really complicated! I can definitely see how that would be annoying. Once I was with my friend and we were talking about Mila Kunis and I said "she's so hot!!" (Because she IS hot) but my friend thought that meant I was a lesbian, which is ludicrous.



Anyway, you're not a homophobe because of this situation. I think what would be really smart of you to do is ignore those people who say you're gay. Do not let is affect you. Show them that you're better than them.



It just high school, soon you'll be around a whole new bunch of people who won't know about all of this. Homophobic people are not worth your worries.



If it helps, Kurt Cobain (lead singer of Nirvana, rich and famous rockstar) said that when he was in high school lots of people thought he was gay. And he grew up to be totally freaking awesome, and he was totally accepting of gays. On one of his albums he wrote somewhere "If you are a racist, sexist or homophobe, don't buy this CD. I don't care if you like me, I hate you." (How metal is that lol)



Just be the intelligent one in this situation. TCs are lame, usually just a bunch of rich kids competing to be cooler than one another, with no real brains or passion for anything. (The TCs at my school are so lame it's actually funny) don't be one of those people who spend their school life trying to fit in or get into the TC group.



The next time your 'friend' says that, give her a really unimpressed look and roll your eyes. That's not something a true friend would say.



Only you can know whether or not you're gay, straight, bi whatever. If you're really attracted to someone you'll know, just be honest with yourself. But don't start believing you're gay if you're not, just because people say you are. You don't have to know right now anyway. What are you, 16? Whatever you decide you are now could change.



I do feel your pain, but being an outcast isn't all that bad. You get to really observe things, and you realise that everyone (basically) in high school are idiots. Self-obsessed, materialistic idiots.

Answer 4

Well if you know you are not gay then you ARE NOT GAY. Don't questions yourself because of other people. Also, maybe you should try to say perverted things about girls to guys you know. Like "Dang, she sure has a good rack!" or "I'd tap shelly, how bout you?" Or even just talk to other guys about girls you find attractive. Just state that they girl is really pretty and that you would like to date them. You could even try to make people see you checking girls out. Maybe you could even ask a few girls out even if you don't want it to go anywhere.

Answer 5

The man usually makes the first move. Even if she’s interested in you, the most she’s likely to do is to stand near you or make eye contact a couple times to encourage you to approach her. Read here https://tr.im/J3OGy



Once you see her, don’t hesitate. 10 minutes from now she might not be there or another guy might have beaten you to the punch. Plus, women can tell when you’re working up the courage to approach. Shyness might be endearing in movies and romance novels, but it doesn’t work in the real world. Approach right away, even if you don’t know what you’re going to say

Answer 6

I HAD THE SAME PROBLEM. You're letting people get to your head. Some girl I use to work with started a rumor that I was gay and people started joking about it for a few years and then I started questioning myself, but realized people's comments were getting to my head.