Question:
Getting back together with ex gf?
Greg
2013-04-23 11:49:38 UTC
We dated for about a month. We had a lot of fun and never fought or argued. Then out of the blue she said she just couldn't love me and ended it but she said she still wanted to be friends. We only talked briefly here and there via text and the odd hello when we seen each other at school (college). This lasted for about two months and then she started texting me more often and we chatted here and there for another month. She said that her bestfriend wants us to get back together (I have never met this friend before so it is based only on what my ex told her about me) but she said she doesn't like getting back together with ex's and the conversation ended their. For the next month (4 now since breakup) we talked more frequently and have hungout a couple times, went for dinner and walks by the water. She hasn't mentioned getting back together again. I still have feelings for her and really want to get back together with her but not sure what to do. I don't want to lose her as a friend by making things awkward again but I also don't want to just let her go yet. I tried going on a couple of dates with other girls but we didn't connect like I did with my ex. What should I do?
Five answers:
BKP
2013-05-01 09:46:49 UTC
Dating an ex is almost always doomed to failure.Quite a sorry start, but it’s something you really have to understand.But still the Qustion is"Are you really ready for it?".



#1.Memories of your ex



So why exactly have you been thinking about your ex and missing them? Is it because you genuinely love them and think the break up was a mistake?



Or is it because your relationship with your ex seemed a lot better than the relationship you’re in now? You really shouldn’t try to get back with your ex because you’re having a hard time getting into a new relationship or experiencing another bad relationship.



Here are a few things you need to ask yourself. If you still think you should date your ex after giving these aspects a thought, well, perhaps, you are ready to take a plunge back into the same waters all over again. After all, dating an ex for all the wrong reasons will do nothing but take you back to square one.

Comparing your present with your past



#2.Dating an ex is extremely tempting after a break up.



When you’re in a relationship, you get to do a lot of couple things together, be it in bed, at a party or while lazing at home. But the minute you break up, it’s all over. All of a sudden, you would have to force yourself into a whole new life whether you’re ready or not.



Even if you’re in a relationship with someone else, you can’t help but compare your ex with your current partner now and then. And if your current partner lacks in a few departments when compared to your ex, you’d obviously feel a huge surge of renewed appreciation for your ex.



#3.Is it the sex?



You can’t really grab an ex wherever you want to, now that both of you have broken up. You may bump into an ex now and then, and the most you can do is admire how good they look, especially if they’re in someone else’s arms!



Sex with an ex can be a rather tempting proposition, and the breakup may renew all the passion and sexual attraction that may have been lacking while you were in the relationship with you ex. Most people confuse this kind of an attraction with love. But it really isn’t.



#4.Is it really love?



The only reason you should ever get back with an ex is if you truly love them and find yourself shattered after the break up. If you’ve been dumped or found yourself walking out on a cheating partner, you may still love your ex and may want to start dating your ex again. But should you take a chance on your ex’s love again?



#5.Is the feeling mutual?



Do both of you want to get back together or is it just a one sided love story with no happy ending in sight? If your lover is happy in another relationship and has no interest in getting back with you, you really can’t force your ex into walking out of a happy relationship just for you. The only way you can date your ex is if both of you want to get back together and give the old romance another chance at being happy.



#6.Where did you go wrong?



This is treading on tricky grounds because both of you may not always be too keen to accept responsibility. But can you really pinpoint where both of you went wrong in the relationship? Dating an ex is easy, but going through the same pain and frustrations all over again is just not worth the effort unless both of you avoid repeating the same mistakes all over again.



#7.Is there enough maturity?



Have both of you matured emotionally since the break up? When you’re experiencing a messy relationship, it’s easy for two grown people to behave like children, especially when it comes to things like relationship insecurity, jealousy and communication.



Do you genuinely think you and your ex can look past the earlier errors and avoid them from ever happening again?



#8.Will the same mistakes crop up again?



If you want to date an ex, you have to be willing to take a chance together with a hope of something better the second time around. But can you prevent the same mistakes that happened the first time around from cropping up this time around? And even if the same painful memories surface, are both of you ready to face it and overcome it?



#9.Is a second chance worth the effort?



Dating an ex again can feel so good, especially for the first few weeks or months. The novelty of getting your ex back in your arms could seem intoxicating and the sex may be fabulous. But at some point of time, the relationship will start to attain its maturity, and it will happen much faster than a new relationship because both of you know each other so well already.



When the excitement does wear off eventually, would you still be happy to spend the rest of your life with your partner?



Can you really see your ex as someone you can spend the rest of your life with, once the novelty and excitement wears off? If you’re unsure of any of these questions, perhaps you should ponder over your thought of dating an ex again and give these questions a serious thought before taking the plunge again.





From:BKP
2014-10-24 06:30:16 UTC
Discover how to get your ex back with simple text message: http://getyourexback.checkhere.info



Many girls break up with their significant others, is because they need time to figure things out. Don't take it personally, if you want her back, you have to show her you can help her. If you love her then you'll let her go, that's it. Not everybody who you date in high school you end up staying with, the chances are extremely unlikely. So if she doesn't want to, then you need to let her go.
?
2016-04-30 23:42:30 UTC
Want to know how to get your ex back? Change yourself. Don't worry about changing other people, worry about changing yourself. Go to https://tr.im/SubaT



Once you do that then you can start to worry about getting back together with your ex, other wise you will find that you are fighting about all the same things and getting no where. Do what it takes and I promise things will work out in your favor.



The funny thing is I came to the realization that I had to change a little too late. After I was kicked out and after I was about to lose the only things that truly mattered to me - her love. A funny thing happens when we truly love someone and lose them. We do what ever it takes to get them back. For me I had to drop bad habits that had caused not only our relationship to sour but practically every other relationship I had had in the past. Not only with women, but with friends, co-workers, family, you name it.



Which is why I say to you as my ex at the time said to me, the only thing you can do is change yourself. Work on yourself and improve on the person that you already are. Drop the negative things in your life that don't belong there and you will see all of your relationships start to take off to new heights.
2013-04-23 11:56:51 UTC
Obviously she doesn't love you in a romantic way but you love her. Her friend can see that you love her and that her friend has trouble connecting with people. In that way, you're "good for her" but she is definitely NOT good for you.



You need to get over her and move on to someone else. It's unfortunate, but that's the case. You need to keep dating other girls until you're over her and even then, keep dating other girls until you find someone who is going to reciprocate your feelings. A woman who tells a guy she doesn't love him and then just ignores his feelings is not a good woman to date. Trust me on this one.
Mili
2013-04-23 11:59:10 UTC
Dance


This content was originally posted on Y! Answers, a Q&A website that shut down in 2021.
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