If you are bored, please offer guidance with this relationship issue?

Question

I am dating a guy who is awesome, enough said. I will list the positives, and then what I feel is missing.
Please tell me if I am being crazy, or if there is a way I can bring up this issue to him.
We have compatible humor, great sexual chemistry, strong ability to talk and resolve issues, we enjoy each other's friends, we have trust (no jealousy), we are both financially independent, we have lives apart from one another, but spend good time together when we can.

This relationship is relatively fresh (just over 3 months), but we have confirmed that we are seeing each other exclusively and it is a relationship we both take seriously.

Now, the bad.

My last boyfriend was a four year relationship and he was my best friend.
I feel like the thing missing is that true friendship level I am used to.
We laugh together, but don't have inside jokes. We talk, but I don't feel that he fully understands me. Days we aren't together he will only text me to say what he is up to, "on my way to work", etc... but not randomly just to have a laugh together or something.

My last boy and I had moved in together right away, so we moved quite fast, and I have no reference for typical timing when you meet someone.

My question is this:
Does it take time to build a strong friendship level, or is this lack of "friendship level" connection a red flag that will likely never change?
I neither want to walk away from a good thing too soon, nor head too long down a dead end path.

Answer 1

It takes time. He is not going to be like your ex, nor will your relationship with him be similar to your previous one, but it can be good. Perhaps he is wondering the same things himself. If you want to share inside jokes, create a few to share with him. If you want him to share with you the little things going on in his life, share the same with him. And be patient. It takes time. You're both still getting to know each other. He may be apprehensive as well as you are, wondering if he should open up and let you inside. So if you want that from him, show it.

Answer 2

You are comparing a 4 year boyfriend to a 3 month boyfriend, one you see as a longtime friend/ex, the other as a boyfriend. This lack of a 'friendship level' is a lack of time together.



I've answered yours, answer mine please https://answersrip.com/question/index?qid=20121106164510AArm1y6&r=w

Answer 3

I may be wrong but it sounds to me like you are still hankering after your ex - you are comparing you new boyfriend to him.

They are different people - no two relationships will be the same. I think you are being unfair on the new guy.