Question:
help help help and help?
cmona
2009-11-08 10:17:32 UTC
my relationship started back in 2003....after 3 ys he had to move to another country because of work. we kept on together handling a long distance relationship bc he was not sure to commit. during these years he has cheated on me ONCE for distraction, bore, or whatever. I forgave him and started over...he has got many issues esp related to an old important relationship.
our relationship seems like almost at the end now...and i feel lonely,empty and drained. i have put all myself to this relationship - made a lot of efforts and been faithful and completely devoted to him.
now he is depressed, confused about his feelings for me and still doubting on his ex. we talked last night on the phone for 2 hours. at the end of the conversation he sent to me a text saying that "he is a troubled soul, unhappy man and he does not understand his life and how i can tolerate to stay in it "I tried to call him the morning after but he did not accept my phone call neither my texts/only this afternoon he sent to me an email saying : "ive got some things in my mind that I need to sort out. Okay? Try to sleep, enjoy the rest of your weekend,week.."
that's it. I really think that's it. i feel lost empty and lonely.
This relationship is a mess but the most beautiful and most important part of my life. I have a good life, happy family and friends and this will sound weird to you but ... he has some Unhealthy attraction to girls who are COMPLETELY ALONE in life and that need a lot of help and support. it makes it feel like a MAN. i find it very unhealthy but at the same time I hate the fact that he does not realize that I DO NEED HIM in my life no matter how fortunate i am! he cannot feel me HIS for real bc of these things and this is very sad and unfair to me.
I think this is the end -- why am I venting here? Because I have the hope to read some advice/suggestion from you on HOW TO MANAGE THIS BREAKING UP.Some of you might think "long distance wold make it easier to move on" BUT to me is the opposite. I will DEFINITELY have no chance to see him again not even one last time- I will have NO Idea of what he is doing tomorrow, how he feels, if he is happy or not, how life is treating him, if he is safe or in trouble........itd be possible to bump into each other someday if close but THIS IS a real NIGHTMARE. i am crying whiel i write this because FACING THE TRUTH IS THE MOST DIFFICULT THING even if the rightest one.
PLEASE HELP ME.I AM IN REAL PAIN.I Was used to call him up, send him many many texts emails very often, call him up at my nights which would be his days bc of the timezone....he still made my day even if his presence was not here. I FEEL LIKE I AM ABOUT TO GO CRAZY.
Five answers:
2009-11-08 10:44:45 UTC
Helping a person like you is very crucial.From the story i can see you really love him,you dont want to lose him,he is your everything or was,BUT,the worst thing you wouldnt wanna do is to hurt him.him seeing you crazy will hurt him most.When a ship is leaving off the coast,the picture of it becomes small ,smaller until to the smallest.Where it goes it apear big ,bigger until the biggest.If the ship is made for return IT WILL RETURN.Let him go,He will come back if he was made for you.All you have to do is to wait untill the image is bigger unitl biggest then put an anchor,then the ship wont leave.If he doesnt come then wait,the moment wait beleive me is the moment of forgetting.EVERYDAY DONT FORGET TO PUT AIR IN YOUR LUNGS and thats through BREATHING.
livermore
2016-09-24 13:38:30 UTC
First of all this different man is a long way a long way away. What style of courting could that be. On the otherhand, if you're having moment ideas in your present boyfriend, it isn't reasonable to him, to only be there whilst you're eager for any one else. Many couples should not have "ardour", truthfully such a lot don't. Your bf seems like a well man to can help you inform him "practically" whatever. I stated practically bc he does not understand approximately the opposite man. If you're simply in need of to peer exclusive men be reasonable in your bf and allow him understand you wish to have a holiday. Just by means of speakme on the web to this different man does no longer guarentee he'll be a well man. It might look that manner on the web and to start with while you meet him then the actual colours will pop out, however to not say that he could not be a well man, it would move both manner. Just watch out & well good fortune along with your selection.
?
2009-11-08 10:27:46 UTC
I know you hurt and are crying. Please don't think of me as cold. I need to bottom line this for you. He cheated on you once and you have all this pain. You are not married and he live in another country. I think the writing is an the wall. Why waste one more moment of your life with him when you can have a real and healthy relationship with someone? I know being alone is scary for some people. You really should be happy by yourself before you date again. Men should never make you who you are, they should make you be and want to be a better you. Peace
2009-11-08 10:25:22 UTC
Hi fragolina.



This happens to a few amount of people. But I know what you should do. I suggest you go on with your life, don't move or anything, just make your life normal without HIM. Tell your friends and they'll help you out, you're still going to be sad but in the long run it will be better. Maybe he will come back to you, it is highly possibly. Just keep on going on with your life do not acknowledge him unless he acknowledges you 1st



Hope it helps.
2009-11-08 10:30:06 UTC
I can appreciate your heartbreak but this guy is obviously bad news. Stop responding to his attempts to communicate for a while, he'll begin to get the message.



Then go out and find that almost any other man will find you attractive and be willing to spend time with you.



Then you can truthfully tell your about-to-be-ex that you've found another man.and explain why you did and why you had to.


This content was originally posted on Y! Answers, a Q&A website that shut down in 2021.
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