posted before but no response?

Question

ok I actually originally posted this under friends (tho yahoo messed that up) and was told to try here. When I did that, I got no response.
Also I didn't think this section applied to all of it, particularly guy A, but whatever, ill try it.

Sorry for the length

OK, i have posted a a couple questions, a whole bunch of times each, but honestly than answers i got for some of them didn't work. hence my reposting them so many time before. It was always either spam, or answers that were great advice, but didn't work for my particular situation. (or people who just wanted to go off on me, when they had obviously not even read the question and crap) So im going to put it all here, and see if i can get some better feedback.

Also, I'm sorry its so long, but its a big issues/issues that have been bothering me and i dont have anyone that can really help.

Guy A and I were great friends, He liked me (it was a rebound thing) and I grew to like him, he stopped likeing me but i still liked him and he knew it. I got over him and made it quite clear, even asked him about another guy at one point. Lately the friendship has gone downhill, with him alternating between treating me like **** and being quite friendly. Really kind of Bi polar. I also noticed that he pulled his relatioship status from facebook, and from that and my friends opinion that he likes someone, I've wondered if there is a girl and for some reason that has an affect on whether he wants to be friends with me anymore. He still talk to the other girls we are friends with all the time.

Guy B recently broke up with his girl friend. He is obviously still really hurting (and she is being a ***** and I don't think thats helping, but I never liked how she treated him). I and my roommate/friend have been having him over a bunch randomly to try and cheer him up. And i've been finding myself really attracted to him. I think I may be starting to like him, but i'm not sure. (and yes i know, even if I am, he needs time)

All of these people are all friend with each other, we are kind of one big group. there has been some splitting off lately though, and the exgirl friend has ditched I and my roomie/friend etc. I was honestly just friends with her out of necessity cuz everyone else was anyway, so im not to worried about that.

But my question is what do I do about both of these guys. And for guy A, why is he pulling away and being such a dick all of the sudden? If you can give me any advice or opinions please do. I know no one can tell me how I feel for sure about guy B, but some opinions on the matter would be appreciated.

Answer 1

i say just stay away from both of them and find a new guy

Answer 2

I think that maybe Guy A really disliked the on-again/off-again friendship and wanted something solid or maybe nothing at all so he just withdrew himself from the equation. I think you may want to talk to him about it or, if you don't like that option, maybe you should just kind of withdraw too (without seeming rude or weird though). If he asks you to do something (if he initiates something) then I would go with the flow because obviously he WANTS to hang out with you if that happens.



As for guy B, I think that he is definitely still rebounding so you should give him some time. Maybe drop subtle hints that you like him (like a warm smile or a hug) but make sure to give him space. He may not be ready for another relationship and then it would become awkward if he had to confront you. I would wait for him to make the first "move" (like a kiss or something) though.



Thanks for answering my question! Hope this helps. Good luck :)

Answer 3

Hi,



I found out that guys want what they can not have. I have experienced it for my self. For guy A: maybe when he found out that you have moved on, he started to get confused. He now does not have your feelings anymore and that scares him. You never know what you have until it is gone. He is maybe schizophrenic because he thinks he made a mistake. But in that case I do not suggest you get back with him, if you want him at curtain point, he must be more stabile.

Or maybe guy A, have some problems of his one, I really think you should ask him about his behaviour. You should arrange a lunch if you could or even call him. The most important think is you act cheerful and happy when you are with him and discussing this problem. Do not let him think that this affects you so much but just let him know that you guys are friend and he is acting weird lately and you don’t lake the way he is treating you. Do let him know that this is not your whole world and you can move one if he does not stop.

For guy B, I think is fun that you have moved on and started to get feeling for some other guy. Do not over think it now, the guy is hurt and you should definitely wait. Take this time for him to heal and for you to figure out your feeling. Be there for him and if he starts to feel for you just go for it. I know you all are friend but you are all single and you have the right to be with anyone you want. You do not like his ex and she sound horrible so don’t care about people that is not worth your time. Have fun and explore your feelings for him. Good luck

Answer 4

Guy A. Hmmmm, I think that's very strange that he would treat you well or really badly. He does seem Bi polar. If it was for a rebound initially, it may be that he was just using you all together. (Just trying to be honest sweetie) Either way, you don't deserve to be treated in whichever mood he seems to be in that day. I would start ditching him, if you like him he'll probably like that you're ditching him because some guys are weird a like to be ignored. True story! :-)



If you like Guy B, I say go for it but I'd be subtle. Don't push him or be too direct. Like you said he still needs time. When I met my boyfriend he was literally JUST getting out of a year long relationship. So I had to be patient with him, allow him to get over her and comfort him without getting jealous of their past. (Which I sometimes did) We have not been together for over a year. So you never know! I'd say take a chance and see what happens! Good luck to you!!

Answer 5

Guy A probably still likes you and is having mixed feelings about being rejected doesn't know how to handle it so cutting you off deals with the problem. For guy B don't be the rebound girl especially if you all share friends in common it just makes thing awkward. This is just my opinion.

Answer 6

Guy A- is a douche. If you end up dating this guy, i guarantee that he will be an asshole and treat you like crap until the day you dump him.



Guy B- You gotta give him space. He hurting and all you should do is be there for him as a friend, but nothing else. Rebound relationships are never good!

Answer 7

Guy A is an asshole. Leave him at that.



Guy B, if I were you I would have stayed away from him too: he is not ready. Secodn, you have already been used as a rebound by guy A, there is a possiblity that guy B does the same too.



I am sure if you make other firneds guy B will cherish you, but please stop being there for him. I did that and it did not work. It will hurt you more.

Answer 8

Try and find some guys that haven't broken up recently. Give guy B time and forget about Guy a . He doesn't seem very nice at all.



Hope that helped.

Answer 9

U should stay friends for a while eventually u will lose feelings for one of them, if u don't then just wait until one of them asks u out. U don't want to jeopardize your friendship.

Answer 10

why dont you just try being friends with a + b, & leaving at that. a doesnt sound that nice, & seems to be into mind games & b is not ready. maybe try guys outside the group of friends.

Answer 11

They both sound like a pain in the @$$ find some one who loves everything about you and cant get enough of you.

Answer 12

try to just be friends with them and they might grow to like you even more especially if you are supportive of them and there for them most girls don't give two shits about me and thats expected. If you make yourself available they will come to you.



Please help with my question.



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