how do you make things easier for a couple that have bi polar disorder?

Question

i go out with this girl for about a year and a half ,i knew what i was getting into and still want to spend my life with her.
my questions is if any1 has any insight with being with someone with bi-polar disorder(s) and maybe any advice to help things a lil easier.
she takes medications,but if were gonna have a kid someday i think she would have to stop taking those.
any suggestions that arent "BREAK UP"?
any positive pointers are heartily appreciated!!!

Answer 1

you dear, sweet man! i am bipolar and my husband has put up with me for 3 years! (we have been married for only one of those) it takes a lot of patience, listening, understanding, letting her just have her fits and moments where everything in the world is evil, and then letting her run into your arms when she is so upset over the way she just acted. sound familiar? i'm going to cry sharing this with you! It sounds to me like you love her that much, which is so awesome because my hubby loves me that much too, and that is so hard to find! so just be there for her. i have only tried meds a few times, but i get tired of the anxiety and the doctors. not to mention, we have one child who is 17 months and one on the way. that means that most of the time we have been together i haven't been on meds. i believe that with the right encouragement and counseling and help from you when she gets overwhelmed it is possible. However, since I haven't been medicated all this time, I do not know what it is like to go off meds that she has likely been on for an extended amount of time. That will be your biggest challenge. Just continue to love and support her, and try not to feed into her negative moods. I really hope this helps, even if it's just a little bit. You are awesome!!!

Answer 2

Coming from Experience, I have bipolar disorder and so did my significant other. We split because he wouldn't take his meds. I took meds and I was great. I have had a kid, and if you think her disorder is bad now, it will get a little worse if she gets pregnant and they do have meds you can take while being pregnant. So don't worry. Bipolar is a vary misunderstood condition. I think your best bet is to read up on it. There are tons of websites out there where you can get more correct info. My suggestion for you is.. you have to take your time with her, don't jump to conclusions to fast. She has a disorder so she may be a little hard to read some days but she is still the same person. I'm not going to lie it is very hard, because feelings change so often but you have to give her the benefit of doubt. Once you become more familiar with her problem then things will be a breeze. If things tend to get rocky just know that tomorrow is another day and she will feel differently as well. And if she gets unstable they may have to reevaluate her dosage. i hope this helps some. Just remember she is someone you feel in love with and you can always make things work and show her that you want to by knowing more about the condition and taking that into any difference that may arise

Answer 3

She wouldn't have to go off her medications if she's going to have a kid some day. You have to realize that if someone with Bi-polar is on meds it is very important for them to be taking those at all times; if they are not on their meds be prepared for LOTS of arguments and she may start acting estranged and think that you are very against her; even if you are not.



My best friend is bi-polar and she is an amazing woman... There are days where she hasn't had her meds and she's just very up and down and there are arguments. Her husband is actually bi-polar too; they are currently going through separation because her hubby has decided to stop taking his meds. They have 1 child and she is beautiful.



You can make it work; it can be like a normal relationship. When you are ready to have a baby; please consult a doctor. They will lower or change the meds to be baby-safe most antidepressants that are lithium free are alright :) Just remember to be supportive. It can be hard; thats like with all relationships.

Answer 4

my husband is very bi polar and it is a battle everyday. You just have to understand that it is a serious illness and sometimes the person cant control some of the things they say or do. be understanding but dont let it be an excuse for everything. if you love this girl as much as i think you do, youre already doing the right thing. also, meds arent always the best way to treat the disorder, they made my husband worse.

Answer 5

I don't have experience dating someone with bipolar disorder, but I've had a few friends who are bipolar.



Keep your relationship honest with minimal drama (if it resembles any couple on tv, try couple's counseling). Be polite and assertive with each other about your desires or preferences to prevent unnecessary fights/arguments/emotional tension. Learn basic mediation techniques, like using "I" statements when phrasing a concern or cause of unhappiness, and use them to resolve conflicts without hurtful arguing. This is useful in any healthy relationship.



Learn as much as you can about bi-polar disorder in general, then learn the specific patterns and symptoms your partner experiences. This will help you be aware of any problems and react appropriately in an understanding and supportive manner. Don't, however, showcase that you are recording her behavior, as it can be perceived as controlling and condescending.



Encourage regular appointments with her psychiatrist/counselor and be supportive (but don't nag) with whatever exercises or suggestions are prescribed. This may include charting her energy level or keeping a journal.



Have a list of contacts, like her doctors, family members, helplines, and whatever resources you may need should an emergency arise. Ask her to help with the list because

(1) she may have some useful suggestions and

(2) you don't want her to find it (if she doesn't know about it) and feel you are planning to gang up on her. Keep the list handy at all times.



Ask her if she'd mind if you met with her doctor/regular counselor. Have a private appointment to voice your concerns and get a professional's answer to your question. Let him/her know what you plan to do (like if you plan on following any of my suggestions) and ask for suggestions and recommendations to improve them. This person is the most reliable resource for answering your question, despite all the well-meaning answers, including mine, on the internet.



Lastly, if you have children, be aware of their emotional patterns for the same reasons.

Answer 6

Hello hon, you realise that you have a problem you can't cope with - have you spoke to your mam about it? I bet she has realised that you have been acting differently. Firstly don't get caught up on fitting into a particular syndrome like bipolar for example.People are people, and we are all different no one fits into a set box. It's psychologists that put you in them. Just let yourself feel how you feel and talk about it, then ride it out when it comes and goes. You can go to the doctors without your mon even minors have confidentiality in these cases ( there only exceptions are cases that break the law like sexual abuse, but even then they are deal with sensitively). I really think that you need professional help, your doctor can help you, all the best

Answer 7

Living in a manic/depressive/bi-polar family taught me a few things. Take the meds as long as the Dr says (if you want a kid talk w/Dr about the meds, issues, stopping meds, etc...).



Be patient! And if you need to help her more at certain times don't complain, just do it. If you love her that's great, just realize it may not always be sunshine & roses.

Answer 8

Yes it can be manageable and workable.



The first medical breakthrough in treating bipolar disorder came in the 1950s. Today, there are many medicines and other ways to manage bipolar disorder. People with bipolar disorder hold jobs, raise families, and live full lives.



Treatment for bipolar disorder can vary. What works for one person may not work for someone else. That's why it's very important to work with your healthcare provider to find a treatment or a combination of treatments that work for you.



There are 3 basic parts of treatment for bipolar disorder. They are medicine, therapy, and learning more about the condition so you can take care of yourself.



Learn about the different Medicines to treat bipolar symptoms.

Find out how Therapy can help.

Things you can do to help can be found in Self-Care.

Studies to help find better ways to treat bipolar disorder are discussed in Clinical Trials.

For advice on getting help from an expert, read the Talking with Your Healthcare Provider

Answer 9

Best advice is to seek help from a professional. They deal with this on a daily basis, and know the struggles of coping, and living with this disease. Unfortunately, there are no easy "fixes". Medication is a must for bi-polar, to keep it in check, and to keep you from going crazy, and those around you. It hurts everyone. Especially children. Talk to a doctor about what you can do to cope with every day living. Good luck, best wishes to you.

Answer 10

I can tell you really care about her and that is so sweet. If things get to complicated I would consider seeing a therapist like a couple session to help. Also if you and her are not interested in that just tell her how much she means to you and how much you love her. Words mean everything and it is the little things that matter the most to us. Also bringing her some flowers home once in a while wouldn't hurt, but in the long run if it is meant to be it will be. Just be positive and try not to hurt her. Good luck and best wishes to you

Answer 11

I wish I could help but I can relate, I have not been officially diagnosed but Im pretty sure I have bipolar depression, where I go from being normal and holding down a job to being so depressed I dont even get out of bed. Realize bipolar people really cant help this disorder, maybe counseling can help you guys, I wish you the best though!

Answer 12

Dude you sound like a little kid. Being bi polar isnt a life threatening thing. And she should not stop taking her meds if you have kids. She should take them more often. America is getting stupid obviously.

Answer 13

If you truly love her, do not break up, nowadays there is a "cure" for anything. Tylenol "stops" pain, flu medicine "cures" the flu, so on and so on.



heres a bipolar site, i didnt explore all of it, but it might have something useful:

http://bipolar.about.com/cs/bpbasics/a/0210_whatisbp.htm

Answer 14

Don't play along with her irrational delutions and ideas just to make her happy. You can't win an argument with her so get used to it. Good Luck!





P.S. Love makes you do some crazy sh** and this is some of it.

Answer 15

I think couples counseling would be a good idea. I'm against the idea of a lot of pills.

Answer 16

go to the psycharatris and gets lots of pills

Answer 17

Talk to her about it

Answer 18

be bi polar too.