What should I do about being in love with a boy for 6 years. He's a man now, and I'm still a teen. Help?

Question

I'm 16, about to be 17 and through the years, one boy has stayed in my heart past all of the others. I first saw him/met him when I was 11 years old as a camper at a summer camp that I go to each year. He was 16 or 17 then. Within a weeks time, I had learned how amazingly funny he was (he could get me to cry with laughter at his humor), he was nice, charming, had an adorable personality and kept a subtle, but reigning leadership. Not to mention he was the best looking one there EVERY YEAR. Everyone at camp, councilors and campers both, looked up to him as a person, even though he was 3 or 4 years younger than most of the staff. I wish I could remember more about how it happened, but I started falling for him. Gradually, but surely. Within 3 days of observing who he was, I felt like I was in love. I know I was only 10 or 11 that summer, but each year we came back to camp, each year my feeling of love for him grew, deeper and deeper. I missed him desperately over the course of a year when I couldn't see him.
The reason he knows me and doesn't see me as just a camper is because I am a musician, like he is. He wanted to get to know me because I am a talented player for my age and any musician can recognize that. The fact the He would come up to Me only made my fantasies seem like they could be real. "Could my dream man really be talking to me out of his own free will? I am so much younger than he is... I love this; I've always dreamed of this, but...How Is This Happening?"
This question/message isn't aimed at giving you, the reader, a credible source that states that 'I am in love with this man.' Rather, I would like to see answers that may help me get over him not coming to camp this summer. I'll be there for three weeks volunteering, one of the weeks is alumni week and he went off to college in 2007 and only visited for 2 nights in summer 2008. If he isn't able to come to camp this summer, how can I get past the loss without breaking down?
Last summer, before I went off to camp, I cried my eyes out the night before I went, breaking down after a year of dealing with the fact that 'he may not show up this summer. (2009)' The reality of the fact that he might not be there, tore me apart and ripped me to shreds. Now, This summer (I leave on July 11th) it seems very real to me that he may be there for alumni week. But what if he's not..? The thought terrifies me. Deep down, I can tell that I've relied on the small surviving flame of possibility that he may be there for me. That's where I need the help. What should I do to stay 'stable' if the love of my life isn't able to come this summer? What do you think I should do in order to stay calm, sane, and collected? I don't want to loose it, but I'm fearing that I might go crazy the night before I leave, mourning the future, thinking I'll really have to live the rest of my life without seeing him (don't ask why).
He means the world to me. I feel so in love with this man. I've gone 6 years with every memory I can find, churning in my head and my heart. We do have a connection; a musical connection, and we're friends, we love the camp we go to, we get along and we both enjoy each other's company. He is no impossible-celebrity crush But my issue with this year is, if he's at camp this summer, we'll have time to actually be together and get to know each other more and spend time together as friends. He doesn't know I feel so strongly for him. My 'in-love' feelings aren't immature, they're not uneducated or exaggerated. I may be young, but I Know What Love Is; Don't try to imply that I don't know what I'm talking about. I do.

Please, tell me what's on your mind, as long as it isn't mean or rude to say. If you've ever loved someone, you may understand some of my situation. Anything at all may help. Also, answering one or some or all of the questions that i asked above or below would be an amazing help. Thank you very much for your kind help.

What should I do with the opportunity to spend time with him? What should I tell him about how I feel, and how should I say it? How can I keep myself sane and okay, without having a breakdown and freaking out about his possible absence?

Answer 1

i would just wait till your 18. i know it sounds like waiting a long time but if you love him so much you dont want him to get in trouble... google the age requirments for your state to see if 17 is legal.. some states i think it is.. and then when it is legal go for it you only live once follow your heart, i wish i had ever felt this way about anyone..

Answer 2

The boy will answer that question whilst he's the right age & is familiar with himself extra beneficial. My son performed with Barbies, I puzzled from the time he became 2 if he became gay, he's now 19 and looks to be rapidly yet i could rather like him the two way. My maximum suitable suggestion to any discern is to permit the youngster be, attempting to alter him might purely reason extra soreness down the line (might reason the youngster confusion, self loathing, melancholy, etc) as he matures. being youthful may be painful even without those themes and much extra so without the help of kin and kin. If he's gay he won't advance out of it, tell the mum and dad to love and help their new child, go away the concepts open for the boy to precise himself, toddlers this age do no longer probable comprehend rapidly or gay yet they are able to sense the sentiments in those reacting around him, in basic terms love & settle for the boy!!!

Answer 3

If he is what you want then 1st get in contact with em like FB or something, talk a bit, once you tell em uve had a crush on em see how he responds



Dont go so fast esp. if he has no idea your feelings but you might need to be quicker than usual given that he is probably looking for someone, that is, if he hasnt found someone yet.

Answer 4

L0L yeah I want to help you but I don't feel like reading all of this... sum it up

Answer 5

too long sorry