I need help :( broken heart!!?

Question

k so ive been datin this guy for 2yrs n 6 months,,n i luv him more than words can tell,,,so does he,, but we're like the total opposites,,im more like the decent one-i dont like drinkin&smoking n all tht,,,but he does, he loves beer n i cant stand itt!! he finds it fun but i feel bad when i see tht,,he smokes too but not when im there-except for exceptional times,,his frndz r all big guys,,who work i mean, they all hang out n hit drinkin spots,,,he took me once though i didnt want to go i had to!,,i felt like he deserves someone else,, someone who wouldnt have a prob wid his drinkin n smokin n who'd drink wid him n all tht,,,i wish i wasnt like me, but i cant change myself it hurts to be in love :( but it'd be worse if i break up wid him,,im not even thinkin of breakin up wid him anyway..but it hurts so bad plzzzzz help me,,i dont have anyone to talk to abt it,,,i keep crying thinkin tht this is the end n its not gonna work out,, which will not workout cuz another big reason .so im holdin on to it waitin for a miracle to happen,,,but im thinkin if all the sacrifices n make n all the things i do ,i lie to even my closest frndz just to keep this relationship goin,,,i keep thinkin if this is worth the things or the hard work im putin on it to work out...
ps:- he drinks only occasionaly but smokes almost every day which GOD! i cant stand!.. plzz help meee,, n dont post if u dont wanna help

Answer 1

Don't change yourself to make him happy because you won't be happy with who you are. Guys like that love decent women those are the ones they will end up marrying. I have the same problem being a decent women myself. I always seem to attract those type of guys. They will date a party girl but deep down they really want someone decent who they can take home to mom. You can't change him that's who he is and if you're not comfortable with him, leave. That's what I would do. If you stay he thinks that you've accepted his behavior and he probably will never change.

Answer 2

It's hard being in love with someone you have little in common with, which despite what some people might say...it does happen.

The fact remains that nobody should have to change in a relationship because you'll both just end up resenting each other.

If this is causing you pain...crying etc...you need to move on and find someone who is more compatible. On the other hand, you could find things to do together that don't involve drinking or smoking. Try some sports activities like ice-skating, biking etc...



Ultimately the decision is up to you, so good luck.

Answer 3

I gather by your amazing use of the letter z and tons of text like words you are in your mid teens and so is your little dude! (at least I sure as hell hope) He is a guy and this is how we start to express ourselves as a rebel. Smoke and drink. Its only going to get worse, especially in college. Get used to it or get broke up.

Answer 4

ok u could just talk to him and tell him how u feel about his drinking and smoking and ask him to cut back on that stuff. it might help.



sorry u feel bad

Answer 5

damn that's a long question. My advise dump him it sounds like you snagged a loser. If that's not an option due to that big reason your hiding then i think its safe to say your done.

Answer 6

you should really tell him. theres not much anyone of us can really tell you this what you have to do. but really let him know how much you hate it and how much you hate that he smokes. i hate it to and if really cares about you then he should quit. itll be hard but you should try and help out and see what happens

Answer 7

just talk to him about it. I know that sounds dumb but it really helps and if things just don't work out then all I can say is to move on.